Matt and I were finally able to bury our sweet bunny, Fuzzface, today at Hillside Acres in Methuen. (Don’t get me started on why its taken 5 months to bury her. It makes me angry when I think about it.)

I still think about Fuzz on a regular basis. For the most part these days, the memories are nostalgic and a little bittersweet, but mostly happy. I’d been able to get some distance from my grief over the past few months. Today was really hard though, I don’t feel like I’ve lost her all over again, but I do feel freshly the sense of emptiness from her absence.

We buried Fuzz with a collection of Beanbag’s fur from his spring shedding, some fresh basil and mint from our garden, some dried blueberries, cranberries, and apple. I thought it might make her happy to be surrounded by some of her favorite things now that she finally has a place to rest. I got the chance to talk to her, I stroked her cheek and her ears one last time and told her about how Beanbag is doing alright now that he has other bunnies for company again, I told her about volunteering for the House Rabbit Network and how I would never have found my way here if it hadn’t been for her. I said the traditional mourner’s kaddish for her in Hebrew. Matt commended her spirit to God and told her that we’d be looking for her when our time comes. We both watched as they put Fuzz’s box in the ground. We each placed a shovel of dirt into the hole and stood by as the hole was filled and the grass was replaced on the surface. They put a temporary marker in the ground and gave us a set of keys to the gate so we can come visit any time we like. I’ve found a place where I can get a memorial stone made for her with a photograph of her etched into its surface. We’ll come back to visit, place the memorial stone, and plant a couple basil plants for her in a month or so.

I miss my curious little grey bunny. There’s just no way to fill the place where she fit into my heart.